Awaking From a Coma

I want to see the light,
That has been slowly slipping away,
I want to not cry at night,
When thinking of those days.

I want to be able to be fun,
Who I used to be,
But am I strong enough to run,
And become the old me.

Can I beat my emptiness,
That currently consumes my mind,
Will I be able to remember this,
Person I had left behind?

Can I change my name,
To change my persona,
I'm not the same,
Can I awake from a self-inflicted coma?

I've created a monster out of myself,
And sold my being to live another day,
I line up fourth and twelve,
In this pass I must pray.

Tonight I may not sleep,
I need to undo the stitching,
My mind needs to be changed so deep,
And this new me needs ditching.

I just hope my best is good enough,
Though I know it never is,
I know the road is long and rough,
I'm sorry if I don't make it out of this.